Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Venus' View on Turning 50

Me with my maternal grandmother circa 1957



Five years ago when I turned 50, I created a card to insert with the party favors I gave my guests.  I want to share my thoughts about the big 5-0 with you now.





















  • God's majesty becomes more evident to me each day
  • I've been blessed with a phenomenal family
  • I had a really good childhood
  • Waistlines are overrated
  • I'm smarter than my kids think I am
  • My kids are smarter than they pretend to be
  • I won't go to hell for drinking an occasional Margarita or doing the hustle at wedding receptions and birthday parties
  • My joints can predict the weather
  • Favor ain't fair - neither is gravity
  • Nips, tucks and liposuction are becoming more appealing to me every day
  • The 60s and 70s produced the best music in history
  • 50 isn't nearly as old as it used to be
  • It's hip to be square
  • Worrying about what others think of me is a waste of my time
  • The only enemy I have is Satan
  • My parents were right about pretty much everything
  • I wish I'd learned how to make Nana's cornbread dressing 
  • I'm glad I learned how to make Nana's pound cake
  • The bible is the best How-To book ever written
  • Being a grandparent is like math.  It adds joy to your life, subtracts from your wallet and multiplies your Kodak moments
  • Watching my children grow up was bittersweet
  • Watching my children raise their children is sweet revenge
  • I'm grateful for my girlfriends
  • What goes around really does come around
  • I HAVE become my mother
  • Children have a way of humbling you - one way or another
  • Tea is the nectar of God
  • Being transparent is far less stressful than faking it - people find out anyway
  • NOW I respect money
  • There is no such thing as too many pairs of panties
  • I''m convinced that bras, girdles and pantyhose were originally intended to be used torture devices for war criminals
  • Now I have a legitimate excuse for losing my keys, forgetting where I parked - MY AGE!

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